Wow. If humans had but a tiny inkling of their true potential, they’d be blowing up shit with a flicker of thought and manifesting triple cheese burritos with just a blink of an eye. Ah, the Universal Mind. Beam me up Scotty and all that shit. But it’s true. And hard to believe.
This weekend I learned that you can NEVER truly know yourself until you’ve hit your rock bottom. And oh, what a friggin crash. They say that diamonds are produced from being under pressure; I think that most often the end product after all that pressure is just one gigantic turd of old dinosaur dung. That’s my 2 cents. (which, in Canada, is worth literally NOTHING. sigh.)
So many deep realizations, esoterik visitations and a mild case of IBS. Such is my life at the moment- a raw, eye-opening, crampy, ethereal, unpredictable pair of shit-stained knickers. And I am SO ready to air out my dirt laundry. Take that, Gramma!
A few weeks ago I watched a documentary on the artist Eminem. What I learned is that he is able to say all the things he wants to say, “do” the things he wants to do (without actually doing them) by creating this alter ego, Slim Shady. Through his alter ego he can, fight, name-call, fuck, kill, express his deep hurt from being bullied, express his opinions without apology, etc. He literally gets the best, and the worst, of both worlds. Think about it. She certainly is… All jokes aside, I have been meditating on this idea since then. My first thought was, “It’s just another masque to put on.” And after working so hard for all of these months to truthfully and wholly love myself, isn’t this just another escape? My second thought was, “What if I literally lose myself to this ‘other person’?” Is that what “They” refer to as “selling one’s soul to the devil”? My third thought, which still remains as I continue to meditate on it, was “There are many different and unique personas inside all of us; some come out at specific times, places or whilst in certain company”. To try to remove even just one of these personas would be the same as seperating our skin from the bones and then demanding our body to be “complete”. Ommmmmm, I am full of shittttt, ommmmmm.
Peace, until the dawn breaks…