In the midst of change we can often forget about who we are, what we want, and the whole point of initiating the change in the first place. 2016 has brought forth a significant development in my own character and life path; everything that I thought “was” has transformed in to something so incredible and exciting that I almost peed my pants. Twice. For those who have lived fairly constant lives may find it hard to relate, and that’s ok. Polar opposites are important, it’s what keeps balance.
I am fortunate to have friends from varied backgrounds, from different ethnicities, faiths, socio-economic statuses, sexual orientation, etc. I value their opinions and know that whatever they share with me comes from the best intentions; I am reminded though, that most people will give advice according to their own belief system, moral compass and life experience, whatever that may be. While I have a deep and sincere appreciation for every human on this planet, how I choose to live my life is a matter of CHOICE. And that is fluid, like water, ya catch my drift? For as long as I can remember my “self”, I have been experimental by nature, and quite happily so. It’s fun, period. And while there are “toils” to life, I DO believe it is meant to be enjoyed to it’s full potential, and there is actually no “right” or “wrong” choice (in my opinion) except for assholyness. I guess it can happen accidentally, but I choose not to be an asshole. Other than that, I am very much in Camp Choice. I don’t feel the need to “pick a side”, because “sides” have been created by us, which means they can just disappear when we wish them to. The lines we draw in the sand can be the very lines that keep us from rediscovering our Oneness.
As I coyly ferment, my circle of humans I spend time with has changed and grown smaller and more intentional. The choices I make are not “against” anything but rather “for” my own path, which is vast and mostly undiscovered. With every small change or decision I release some build up of whatever was holding me back from taking that step in the first place. Each lesson has broadened my perspective and has stretched boundaries that were only imaginary. Just the thought of the immense possibilities that are out there for all of us gives me the tingles in all the right places.
As I regroup and adjust to my new life I dig my heels in deeper on certain topics and allow everything else to simply float; we are all free, free to live the lives we desire-free, autonomous beings. All we can do is make our best effort and be honest about whether the choices we made yesterday are still suitable for the people we are today. The best advice I’ve ever been given is “whatsoever you do, do it with conviction. And when you change your mind, change it with conviction.”